It has been such a long time since I blogged, that I thought it was only appropriate that my first real post with pictures should be one about the newest member of our family. Since the last time I blogged she wasn't even in my tummy, & now she is a thriving, roly poly 3 month old, there needs to be a proper introduction for her on here, for anyone who even still remembers our blog address & more importantly, for our very own, little family. I have to admit that I didn't even remember our blog address. I had to go to my sister's blog & click on ours in order to even find it. That is pathetic. Oh well, without further adieu, after a long 2 year hiatus, my welcome back blog, introducing our sweet, precious, little addition, Arynee.
After 3 1/2 years of no babies but a few miscarriages, I found out I was pregnant again, in early September 2010. I was so thrilled, yet a little gun shy thinking that given my age - 40 - I would most likely miscarry - again. I stopped running, a pastime I had taken up towards the end of the summer, since the last time I had miscarried was the day after I had gone on a long run & then came back & did a ton of jumping jacks & push ups/sit ups. I was told it was probably unlikely that my exercise was the cause of the miscarriage, but I didn't want to take any chances. A month went by & I was still pregnant. We were elated!
I announced to the children by accident one afternoon while talking to my friend on the phone. I was sitting on the couch, nonchalantly visiting while watching the kids play & watch television. My dear friend, Lisa, whom we knew in Thailand, asked me how I was doing & told me how great I sounded. The last time she & I had spoken was the day I found out I had miscarried, so this day my voice & demeanor was probably noticeably happier. I started to say, "Well, that is funny you should ask. Actually I'm doing great! I found out that I am pregnant!". I no sooner had gotten the words out than Rhees, stunned, turned around & with eyes as big as saucers said, "YOU ARE!!!???". Oh my word! I can't believe I spilled the beans like that. I felt terrible that I wasn't paying attention & that now I wouldn't get to do something really cute to announce to them that they were going to have a new brother or sister. I immediately told Lisa what I had done. She had heard it all happen though, & so she understood when I cut our conversation short so that I could spend some time with the children explaining to them my new condition. I have to say that I was a little concerned that one or more of the kids would be worried about having another person in the family, since some days it seemed like I was barely able to keep it all together for the number of children that we already had. But, my darling, sweet, precious, wonderful children completely surprised me. They were all jumping up & down screaming with excitement! They were absolutely thrilled that we were having another baby. I couldn't have been happier. I had already told Devin, but we were going to wait to tell the kids for a while, to make sure that I wasn't going to miscarry. Oh well, it was out & they were delighted!
For the most part, I had an uneventful pregnancy. Actually nothing dramatic happened at all. However, it was probably the most difficult pregnancy for me, emotionally, mentally, & physically. I don't know if being 40 had anything to do with it, or what, but it was hard. At 5 or 6 months I was already so ready to have a baby in my arms & out of my tummy. I started feeling very claustrophobic & couldn't sleep. I was up all night long, only sleeping for, at most, an hour at a time. I couldn't get a full breathe most of the time, & was very easily irritated. It was so sad, because at the end of the day I would notice that I had lost my temper with the other children more than I had been cute with them. That made me feel so so bad. Except for the miraculous & wonderful fetal movements, I really didn't enjoy being pregnant. That was so different for me than the previous pregnancies, where I really loved being pregnant. I felt guilty that I wasn't enjoying that time, which could easily be the last time I got to have a baby in my tummy. I just wanted my precious, little baby out of my tummy & into my arms so that I could love on her. I wanted her so badly & was feeling very impatient. And why wouldn't I? It had been 4 years since I had held a new baby in my arms. I was so ready to have a little newborn!
My due date was May 15 - May 21 (I was given 3 different dates within that week) & by April I was starting to try to think of ways that I could put myself into labor. One of my visiting teachers, who is a midwife, came over & was talking to me about natural ways that you can assist your body in preparing it to go into labor. I started taking some herbs & some natural pre labor formulas. I was curious to know if they were doing anything. When I had my 1st prenatal visit where they do a vaginal check I was dilated to almost a 2! Wow! That had never happened, at least this early. The stuff I was taking was totally working! I can't remember exactly the date, but I just remember being so excited because I was probably still 4 weeks, maybe a little less, away from the ultrasound's projected due date. I really thought that I was due earlier than the ultrasound said, but the dr. was going with the later dates.
My dr. told me that she wouldn't start me until the 8th or the 9th. I didn't want to wait that long though. In the first place, the kids had their Alice In Wonderland performance on the 9th & I had to play for the Elementary school choir on the 10th & 11th. In the second place Devin was scheduled to go to Mexico. I went into the Dr. on the 2nd of May & she still wouldn't start me. But since I was dilating already, she told me she would strip my membranes. I had had that done before with Kalen & it didn't put me into labor, so I wasn't totally convinced that it would do anything anyway. I asked her what she thought about Devin's trip to Mexico & she said that there was a chance I could go into labor, but also a very real chance that I wouldn't. So she said that we needed to make the decision. Devin had gone to the Dr. with me that day & so afterward I told him what she said, as he had been in the waiting room the whole time. We decided to go to lunch after the Dr., we were both in separate cars, & when we got to Olive Garden, I asked Devin what he was going to do. He told me that he had already made the phone call to Gary to have him go to Mexico for him. I was so excited. That made it feel like it was really, FINALLY, going to happen! I returned back to the Dr. after lunch & she stripped my membranes.
I had contractions for most of the rest of the day & thought I would go into labor that night. But, I didn't. I called my visiting teacher & told her that I thought I was ready for her to help me go into labor. I had been taking Evening Primrose Oil gelcaps orally which are supposed to help your cervix soften & prepare to go into labor. She said that if you use them vaginally they work just like the synthetic drugs which the hospitals use to induce labor. I wanted so much to have our sweet little baby. But I also didn't want to interfere with God's plan of when she was supposed to come. And so, I chickened out & didn't end up going to the birthing center for the insertion of the Evening Primrose oil on Tuesday after all.
By the next day, Wednesday, I had decided that since I had been induced before (although it was when I was either at or over my due date), I would try the Evening Primrose. The only difference was that I was a couple of weeks before my due date, & it wasn't my OB/GYN who was inducing me, or attempting to. I thought that even if I did do that, if it wasn't Heavenly Father's will for Arynee to come that night, I still wouldn't go into labor, even though I was assisting my body to help it happen. Early that afternoon I went to see Melody my VT/midwife, who checked me & told me that the baby was posterior & that if I wanted to do the Evening Primrose, we needed to get her to turn first. She showed me a Yoga position which was supposed to help the baby be uncomfortable enough that it would move, making it so she wasn't posterior anymore. I went home & laid that way for 30 minutes hoping that it would really work. Later that evening, after I got the kids dinner & got them situated, I went to the birthing center. Melody checked me & sure enough, Little Princess had turned & was facing properly. Melody then used the Evening Primrose & had me lay flat for an hour or so. We got talking about so many things that I think I was actually there for 2 hours. She did some pre labor massage on me to help the process even further. I loved the massage. It was actually more like Acupressure than a massage, but it felt like a massage. I definitely started having contractions which were getting consistently more painful. I hoped that they were doing something in the way of making me dilate more. Melody checked my cervix just before I left & it was more than a 2. That meant that it had dilated slightly more. I went home & the contractions kept coming. I was so excited. I stayed up cleaning the bathroom upstairs & the hallway. I had very hard consistent contractions all night until about 3 AM. Then they started to be less consistent. That was making me sad that Heavenly Father was saying, "This isn't the time yet.". By 5:00 AM they had stopped altogether. I was actually okay with that, because it meant that the Lord's timing was still going to prevail, & nothing I had done to assist my body in having a baby was going to change that.
I got ready to go play the piano for the Elementary school choir, just as I normally would on a Thursday morning. Just as I was about to leave, I noticed a small drip & wondered if my bag of waters had a leak in it. I changed my pants & hurried to choir. As I walked into the Elementary school, I felt that again. Wow! That had never happened to me before. I was pretty sure that my water was breaking, but thought that if I just sat still at the piano then I would be okay until after choir got over. I told Karen Thueson, the director, what was happening & that she would probably need to find someone to play for me the next morning for choir. She laughed & said, "Yes, this would happen now.". Our choir concerts were the following Tuesday & Wednesday. But she reassured me that whatever happened it would be okay & that she had someone who could play in my absence. On the way out to the car, & just as I lifted my leg to get up inside, my water full on broke. Water gushed & dripped everywhere. I was SO excited! I had always thought, "I wonder what it would be like to just go into labor on my own & have my water just break somewhere?". Well, now I knew, & I was so so glad that I was getting up inside my car & not at the store or out to dinner, like I have heard stories about other people. My pants really were drenched. It was hilarious. I called Devin & told him that we were going to the hospital that morning. Then I called Melody to tell her. She wanted to check me to see if after all those contractions if I had dilated some more. I was a tight 3 cm. I can't tell you how excited I was. I thought that for sure I would have a baby by early afternoon. I felt like Heavenly Father was just letting things work the way they were supposed to. I didn't go into full labor during the night or need to go to the hospital & then the contractions stopped. But later in the morning, without me doing anything He started the process again for me. It felt good to know that His plan always prevails, & that it is okay for us to assist, but that He is always in control.
I came home & Devin took Kalen over to Murray's to play with Grayson for the day until the kids got home from school, I finished getting my toiletries ready, & we left for the hospital. By this time, the contractions had begun again & I was starting to feel some more pain. It wasn't intense, but it was noticeable. We got to the hospital & my contractions were coming about every 6 to 7 minutes. I checked in, which only took a minute because I had preregistered, & then they left me in the waiting room for 20 more minutes. Nice. That wasn't a promising start to our experience at the hospital. They finally moved me into a triage room for the nurse to come & check me to see if my water had really broken & if I was contracting. I understand their procedure, but really? I guarantee a person would know if their water had really broken or not. I had also tested positive for Group Strep B, which meant that I would need to have 4 hours of IV antibiotic before the baby could be born so that she didn't get the bacteria while she was being delivered. We rushed to the hospital after my water broke, even though my contractions weren't very strong, knowing that we would need the extra 4 hours to get the full antibiotic. I told the nurse this when we first got there, yet we waited in triage forever. The nurse finally came in & checked me & told me that she didn't find a very strong presentation of amniotic fluid, indicating that perhaps my water hadn't really broken. I told her it was probably because all the water had already leaked out over the past now 2+ hours since it had broken. Every time I got up to go to the bathroom, more would drip out on the floor. One time I got a little smart & said to her, as some fluid ran down my leg & made a puddle on the floor, "There is that fluid you have been trying to get.". She then admitted that she believed me that my water really had broken. She checked me & said that because I wasn't having consistent contractions anymore I wasn't in labor & they may send me home. We were getting so frustrated. At about 11:30 or 11:45, they finally had a room available (there were no available delivery rooms when we got there) & that they would start the IV. It wasn't until 12:30, an hour later that they actually came in to do so. A few minutes before they came into my room, Devin said that if they hadn't come to start the IV in the next 5 minutes, we were leaving the hospital & going over to Timpanogos Regional. I almost wish that they wouldn't have come in so that we would have ended up going over to the other hospital. Almost everything got progressively worse the entire time we were there. I had the worst hospital experience ever. In 6 children, Utah Valley Medical Center wins the prize for having the worst anesthesiologist, the most unorganized & unpredictable routine - both pre-delivery & post-delivery, some of the most clinical, uncaring nurses, & the noisiest post partum room ever (it was just across from the nurses station & I got to listen to all their gossip all day & all night long)! The only good thing I can say about the hospital was that the delivery nurse was nice & the food was great. I really was impressed by the food. Everything else was terrible. Totally disappointed!
Well, once the IV was in to run the antibiotic, the waiting game began. My contractions had pretty much stopped altogether & so they eventually came in to start some pitocin to hopefully get the contractions starting again. They did start & about an hour or 2 afterward I decided to have the epidural. I don't know what time that was. The epidural wasn't working the way it was supposed to work & I started feeling light headed like I was going to pass out. My hands & fingers were going numb, my feet & legs were completely numb - immovable - but my torso & abdomen were still in pain. We started getting worried because I really thought that I was going to die. It was getting hard to breath & I was in pain. Devin went & got the anesthesiologist. He came in & very arrogantly said, "So, you're not happy with my epidural huh?!". He was so rude & acted like he took it personal that the epidural was having issues. They told me to change sides so that the medicine wouldn't all just settle in one place & to turn the medicine down a little. That did nothing. So, I told Devin to just shut the medicine off. That helped a little, but my legs were still numb. I don't remember how long that lasted. I think I tried to drift off to sleep for awhile, since I hadn't gone to bed the night before & I was really tired. At one point I started noticing that my back was really hurting. I told Devin that I thought the way they had put the needle & tubing in my back was in wrong & was making my back so sore. Within 10 minutes of noticing the pain, it became excruciating. It hurt so bad & I didn't know why. The epidural had pretty much completely worn off, & I didn't know why it was still hurting. What I didn't know was that after Devin turned off the medicine to the epidural, my labor started to progress & my cervix started to dilate quickly. I was now going through transition, AND the baby had flipped to be posterior again, which was giving me back labor. Oh my!!! That was the worst. All I could do was lay there & cry. Tears just dripped off my face, as I was in so much pain. They called the anesthesiologist back in to check the epidural again. In the meantime the nurse said, "You know, I think that before he comes back in I'm going to check you & see if your pain is coming from your labor & not the site of the epidural. Sure enough, I was almost a 10. She confirmed that the baby was posterior. She had me move slightly to the other side & on my back to see if that would help Little One flip the right way. It did. Right after that they turned the meds back on in the epidural & I started feeling some relief. I was so exhausted. All of this had now taken the entire day & evening. It was about 7:15- 7:30. They called Dr. Savage & she was at her son's basketball game & had to still get to the hospital. By the time she got to the hospital my legs were completely numb again & I couldn't move at all. They helped me up into the stirrups & told me to start pushing. Ha! I couldn't feel a thing to know if I was pushing or not. It was THE WORST! I had always had epidurals with each of the other kids, but this was the first time I couldn't feel anything. I couldn't even tell if my abdominal muscles were tightening to push or not. Somehow after about 20 minutes, our little princess was born. I don't know how she made her way out, because I didn't feel like I was assisting her at all. Apparently I was, but it was the most helpless effort ever.
I had never been so thankful to finally have a baby finally be born in my life. Well, maybe with Rhees & Kambren, they were unpleasant experiences too, but in my mind, in that moment, I was the happiest ever to be holding my baby. All in all I had been in different stages of labor for 24 hours exactly.
7 pounds 3.8 ounces
19 1/2 inches long
May 5, 2011
Well, she does look a little out of it here. But hey, give the girl some credit, it had been a hard day for her too.
Oh, just looking at these sweet, little newborn pictures almost makes me ready for another little person right now. Settle down, I said, "almost". ; )
Arynee has been such a darling, little angel in our family. We wanted & waited for her forever it seemed, & she has completely been worth the wait. She is an easy baby, & has been sleeping so well. She doesn't cry alot, but when she does, you better find some earplugs. She's a bit of a drama queen that way. I'm not sure where her temper comes from. ; ) But we'll keep her. The kids have loved having her with us. They have all been so cute with her. I can't believe how they all want to be near her & touch or hold her. Those little relationships, even now, are just so precious. It will be fun to see how they continue to develop over the years. We are so blessed to have our 6 children. I feel so humbled to know that Heavenly Father has trusted us with another of His little spirit children. I hope & pray that we will be able to take care of her in a way that would be pleasing to Him.
1 comments:
Thanks for sharing Arynee's story! Can't wait to meet her!
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